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GoldenPalace.com Buys Incredible Shrinking Machine on eBay
Once again, the online casino famous for its eBay purchases has added to its collection. In what appears to be a methodical plan to prove that science fiction is science fact, GoldenPalace.com has bought another item from the future: a Shrinking Machine.
The Shrinking Machine, apparently built in the year 2241 by the same inventor that created one of GoldenPalace.com's Time Machines, Dr. J.S. Strauss, was found in an attic. Needless to say, the incredible machine does not, at present, work. However, it once did and the eBay seller has included a selection of items that have been affected by the machine - allegedly. These include: a shrunken old bible, a shrunken knife and shrunken pencil.
Between the non-functioning Time Machine and this Shrinking Machine, it looks like the technical experts at GoldenPalace.com are going to have their hands full trying to get them to work. Still, there are questions regarding the "non-functional" nature of this equipment. It is rumored that though the marketing strategies of this online gambling juggernaut may seem unorthodox, they are the result of visits to the future.
We can only hope that this particular eBay seller continues to repair his home; one can only wonder at what his next historic find will be. You can bet that GoldenPalace.com will be there to snatch up the advanced technology he finds in its ongoing effort to capture the future from the wastes past.
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Comments on this event
On August 22nd, 2005 at 7:51 PM Diva said:
pure B.S. the shrunken items could have been made by a person who makes dollhouse stuff
On August 23rd, 2005 at 10:43 AM Anybody But Diva said:
yuh think? do you think that there's an outside chance that this was just a joke? XD
On August 25th, 2005 at 10:26 AM Anybody said:
nope, this thing is real.
On August 26th, 2005 at 8:02 PM Peewee said:
Tell me about it, "Anybody"...I used to own this dang machine, so I know all too well that it's real.
Unfortunately, I accidently pulled the trigger while picking it up from my lap. This prompted an even more unfortunate chain of events - my new nickname, my divorce, my disabling of this dang machine, hiding it in the attic of my house (to be found later by the eBay seller) and my cancelling of my lifetime membership with the nudist camp because of all the pointing and laughing.
On September 16th, 2005 at 9:26 PM Anybody said:
I really feel for you Peewee. Do you know how to restore the machine's abilities? (I'm talking about the shrinking machine...)
If you can, I'll let you aim it at me and zap away so you can have someone to keep you company. I'm a hot, buxom blonde female. If you aim your machine strategically (again, I'm talking about the shrinking machine), maybe we could be compatible...I really feel that there should be somebody for everybody.
On October 05th, 2005 at 2:31 PM shalean said:
I do not belive that this is possible!Iwould like to see this so called "SHRINKING MACHINE" my self.I think pigs would fly before any one could construct a shrinking machine.it's bs!
On January 19th, 2006 at 12:32 PM Mustaf Herod Apyur Poupr said:
Imagine what would happen if somebody did repair this shrinking machine, reproduced on a wide scale, and distributed it amongst the military of his country! He would benefit enormously from it, and the military of his country could just zap their enemies with these guns and render them as insignificant as bugs!
...Or he could just have some fun and get revenge on certain people that he hates. I guess it would be left to the imagination of the person who actually gets this technology.
On February 06th, 2006 at 1:56 AM Mustava P. said:
This bloody machine was used on me before it was disabled and my bladder was shrunk to the size of a pea, so I always feel like I must have a pee.
On April 14th, 2006 at 2:55 AM htre said:
if you get that thing fixed shrink me please
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